In May, I posted some of my favorite quotes about motherhood and how I’ve come to see motherhood with a vastly different perspective in the years since Ethan was diagnosed with an Autism Spectrum Disorder, in my post Mother Love. I thought it would be fun to put together a similar post for Father’s Day, because I can guarantee that my husband now views “fatherhood” differently than before, too.
Let’s start with a little humor…
A father carries pictures where his money used to be. ~Author Unknown
Now this one made me Laugh Out Loud! My instinct tells me that the phrase was probably written by someone raising a typical child or teenager with standard needs and expenses. But, raising a child with ASD is exponentially more expensive! I know many parents who have sold their homes, emptied savings and college accounts, used up retirement savings and still went into debt to pay for necessary therapies, interventions, special diets and treatments. While this isn’t funny – in the least – it is humorous (I think) in the sense that I stumbled across this quote and thought to myself, “Awww, sweet Mr. ‘Author Unknown’ probably doesn’t know the half of it!”
But in all seriousness, “fatherhood” is much, much more than a fat wallet or a hefty paycheck.

With Mother’s Day around the corner, I have been busy preparing gifts and cards to send off to my absolutely wonderful mother, my grandmother and my mother-in-law. I’ve also been contemplating what I thought “motherhood” would be about before Ethan came into our lives…and, before Autism came into our world. I knew that parenthood would be difficult and fraught with emotion, yet I didn’t fully understand how deeply that emotion would run.
“Making a decision to have a child - it's momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body.” ~Elizabeth Stone
When our kids are joyful, we revel in the beauty of the world through their eyes; when our children hurt, we feel their pain and desperately wish to wipe it away. When our children hit a brick wall, we do everything in our power to help them knock it down.
“Mother love is the fuel that enables a normal human being to do the impossible.” ~Marion C. Garretty
In our journey with Autism, I have met countless mothers who astound me in various ways.

Why is it so hard for moms to take a break? Renowned child psychiatrist, Donald Winnicott (1896-1971) said that struggling with taking a break from maternal responsibilities is normal. “Primary maternal preoccupation is a consuming attachment to one’s baby, a normal sickness from which most mothers recover.” He was talking about the mothers of typical children—who presumably have a little less to be preoccupied with on the average than mothers of children who have autism and other special needs. So it’s normal, but when it goes on indefinitely, it’s not healthy.

Yesterday, one of AutismSpot’s own Featured Bloggers, Psychologist Dr. Robert Naseef, flew through DFW after spending the weekend leading a conference for parents in El Paso. AutismSpot’s visionary Kent Potter took this opportunity to turn Dr. Naseef’s layover into some on-camera time with Dr. Naseef. I was fortunate enough to participate.
Dr. Naseef not only works with families raising children with ASD in the Philidelphia area, he also has an adult son with Autism. I heard Dr. Naseef speak last summer when he hosted a Father’s Panel at the annual conference hosted by the Autism Society. Dr. Naseef is very knowledgeable and forthcoming about what life is like for our families and ways to handle stress and make life better.

Recently here at AutismSpot, we’ve been shining the spotlight on parents raising kids with Autism Spectrum Disorders. As we continue our “Spotlight” series in 2011, I am pleased to share Nancy Mandell’s (aka – Nance) story of motherhood. Actually, an AutismSpot reader who has been following our Spotlight Series suggested that Nance be highlighted because she is a trailblazer for many of the rest of us. Nance’s dedication not only to her two children, but to the many families she helps and inspires on a daily basis is inspirational and appreciated!
Story by Nance Mandell

I am the proud mother of Amanda age 25 and Ryan age 23 who is diagnosed with Asperger’s. My husband and I have been married 29 years and he is a psychologist. I got my degree in Counselor Education from UNT in 1986. I was a late bloomer; married at age 30 and had my children late in life at age 35 and 37.

Recently here at AutismSpot, we’ve been shining the spotlight on parents raising kids with Autism Spectrum Disorders. As we continue our “Spotlight” series in December, we’re featuring mothers from the Dallas/Fort Worth area found in the final photo of The Autism File Autism Mothers Unite Worldwide 2011 Calendar. Click here for more information about our “Spotlight” Series.
Today, it is my pleasure to share Leigh Dusek’s story about her family’s journey with Autism. Leigh’s story has taken many unexpected twists and turns in recent years but she asks for advice when she needs it, shares tips and solutions with others when she can and looks to God for grace when things get especially rough.
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When my husband and I decided to have children we were still newly married and completely excited. I had always wanted to be a mother since I was a child. I love to care for others, and I especially had always loved babies and children. I had worked in the mortgage business and quit to stay home with what was going to be many children we had planned. Steve, my husband was working in a restaurant while attending the Fire Academy. We have 3 children, Noah, Reagan and Gavin. Noah is currently 6, Reagan 4 and Gavin 2.
Noah was the perfect baby. He slept all of the time and ate great. He was so happy all of the time and I was impressed that he could play by himself and that he was so active. But, after Reagan was born I started becoming more worried about Noah’s speech. After 12 months I was worried and the Pediatrician said that it was common for boys to be delayed. However, it was now 18 months. He was yelling all the time and only using vowels.

In the coming months here at AutismSpot, we’re going to be shining the spotlight on parents raising kids with Autism Spectrum Disorders. As we continue our “Spotlight” series in December, we’re featuring mothers from the Dallas/Fort Worth area found in the final photo of The Autism File Autism Mothers Unite Worldwide 2011 Calendar. Click here for more information about our “Spotlight” Series.
Today, it is my pleasure to share Julie Hornok’s candid, touching and thoughtful story. Julie is a tremendous mother and advocate. She’s also an avid blogger, making sure to share her daughter’s progress so that any parent in need of a little hope and inspiration to persevere (in the face of exhaustion and frustration) will be able to find it.
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By Julie Hornok
I was the woman who glared at the kid misbehaving in Target.
I was the mom who was annoyed that my oldest son could no longer bring his favorite peanut butter and jelly sandwich to pre-school because some kid was allergic to peanuts.
Then I had a child with autism, and another child with life-threatening allergies.

In the coming months here at AutismSpot, we’re going to be shining the spotlight on parents raising kids with Autism Spectrum Disorders. As we continue our “Spotlight” series in December, we’re featuring mothers from the Dallas/Fort Worth area found in the final photo of The Autism File Autism Mothers Unite Worldwide 2011 Calendar. Click here for more information about our “Spotlight” Series.
Today, it is my pleasure to share Beth Ausa-Evangelista’s “story” in our new “Spotlight” Series here on AutismSpot. Beth is a gracious friend and mother. She is active in the community – always willing to share great information and support others; her faith and encouraging nature are a true gift to all those who know her.
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LAW: Tell us a little bit about yourself & your family.
BAE: I am a 38-year old Asian, born and raised in the Philippines, by both well respected and loved community and Catholic church leaders in our parish. My father served as the president of the Parish Pastoral Council for years, while my mother served as its Treasurer. I am the eldest of four siblings,

In the coming months here at AutismSpot, we’re going to be shining the spotlight on parents raising kids with Autism Spectrum Disorders. To kick off our “Spotlight” series, we’re starting with mothers featured in The Autism File Autism Mother Unite Worldwide 2011 Calendar.
AutismSpot’s CEO and Founder, Kent Potter, took a tremendous group photo of several women in Texas this past summer. That photo was chosen for January 2012, but is included in the 2011 calendar as a “sneak peek.” Always a visionary, Kent seized the opportunity to shoot each mother individually with plans to share personal stories here. It is my pleasure to share my family’s story first…
Spotlight: Leigh Attaway Wilcox
Mother to Ethan, age 8
From tending to baby dolls’ needs to babysitting neighborhood kids… working at drop-in childcare facilities throughout college to teaching early elementary students, I have always adored children and knew from an early age I wanted to be a mother. I’ve also had a fascination with pencils, pens, paper and words from the tender age of 4. While teaching as an elementary school teacher and later as a literacy specialist, I began to pursue a dream of writing and publishing books for children. When my son, Ethan, was born several years later, I took a hiatus from teaching to focus on raising Ethan, and in my “free time,” on the work of writing, editing, revising, submitting and publishing.