I became a typical father in 1979. It was a dream come true—those magical first smiles, first steps, first words. Then in 1981, my son stopped talking, stopped playing normally, and began flapping his arms. From those first red flags of autism until now, I have not stopped experiencing autism and the family—the central theme of my life and work—counseling, teaching, and writing about the impact of autism on families.

When my son was born in November 1979, I jumped for joy. When he was diagnosed with autism 4 years later, I thought my head was going to explode. I couldn’t get the word autism out of my mouth for months.

Parents frequently confide to me when they have lost their patience. Fathers as well as mothers share their guilt and their heartbreak when this occurs. As one mother said to me recently, "My mother yelled at us, and I vowed to never yell at my children. Now I'm becoming a yeller. What's wrong?"

Why is it so hard for moms to take a break? What can fathers do to help?
First of all, struggling with taking a break from maternal responsibilities is normal. This is hard for the mothers of typical children—who presumably have a little less to be preoccupied about than mothers of children who have autism and other special needs.

With men, there is often an awkward pause before they can find the words to speak. Not about sports—that’s usually easy—but about what it is like to be doing their best to face autism with no “fix,” no exit, just life-altering challenges. Then they share their struggles and what they are learning about how to relate to their children and families. This is some of the work I do as a psychologist who happens to also be the father of an adult child with autism.

Almost two weeks ago I previewed a documentary set to hit theaters this Friday. BULLY, a documentary by Sundance and Emmy-award winning filmmaker Lee Hirshman, is a film every parent needs to see. It is also a film I believe most teens need to see, too.
Many of us raising children with special needs experience sleepless nights worrying about how our kids are treated by peers and even other adults while at school and other activities…about how it will affect them – physically and mentally. This film addresses the toll bullying takes on children, teens and families by following three kids over the course of a school year (Alex, Kelby & Ja’Meya), but it doesn’t stop there.

AutismSpot's own Kent Potter invites men in the Dallas-Fort Worth area to attend a special meeting tomorrow night (Sept. 6, 2011) at 7pm, which will be hosted by the National Autism Association of North Texas. For more details about the location, time and how to RSVP, click HERE or see below.
An Invitation From Kent:
As fathers we play a critical role in the development of our special children. As fathers, husbands, employees, friends, mentors, coaches and sons, we wear many different hats. When we face the autism journey alone it can often be confusing, frustrating, and disheartening to not have others around us who know exactly what we are going through. In addition, we sometimes are not interested in holding hands and trying to provide therapy for one another. The way we approach life as men is often very different than how our wives, sisters, and daughters tackle the challenges that rise up.