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We have a 4 year old on the spectrum, whom is coming along in his behavioural program, and just recently potty trained, and going on his own, Is engaging more with others and his twin brother and speaking a little more, however, the biggest concern is his constant stimming on twirling objects. He does this when there are any gaps without one to one therapy or even during therapy he will constantly look for things to twirl or flap books. We've been through the whole rigamor of every ones advice and probably heard of every thing that you can think of to try to stop the severity of this behavior. And have tried every method to decrease this behavior. Right now we are looking into the son-rise program and wondering if any one last bit of tips to offer. Our question is will this behavior eventually stop as he gets older?


I can only offer what I have experienced with my son. we have also used the sone rise program and I still do in a form of my own today. about the stemming. I have never had any sucess in finding a way to stop a particular behavoir except that if you can give him a more apropriate version of it it will be more helpfull. and remember stemming is most times a way of self regulation and copping. my child is a hand flapper. so I used to hold his hand or tell him to stop but now I will touch his shoulder and ask what he needs and he will either say lighs off or break please or sign help etc. I do not try to stop it when he gets what he needs it goes away on its own. my other son who is NT has to be able to chew on something, anything to do his readding, his teacher has had a real problem with this at school but I had it written and she dose not stop it any more. His grades have gone up and he is less stressed. that is his stem. mine is foot rubbing I rub my feet together to relax. I don't know why but I do. my nick name from my sister was cricket when we were little and sharring a bedroom bescause she complained it was so loud. now I would like to ask you What is your Stem? and how would it feel to have it taken away? please don't take this criticly Just try to look at it from their perspective.
Today is the day. Live in the moment. The choice is ours.

Why stop

I agree. Why do you have to stop this behavior if it isn't hurting anybody. My son flaps, claps, runs but it is just his way of calming himself. I am afraid of what he would do if he wasn't able to do these things. Let the child be if he isn't hurting himself or others. I have never really read any ways to decrease that anyone except inserting a new behavior in to replace the old one. Good luck.


Can only offer our experience. Our son is 12 and has done the same kind of stimming you describe for 10 years, but....

We have done many biomedical interventions including GFCF diet and heavy metals chelation. Over the years we have seen that the better his nervous system is functioning the less he wants to stim. Stressful situations, happy excitement, and pain in the stomach or bowels all seem to increase the need to stim.

It's interesting that Humanness mentions foot rubbing, because just recently we discovered that rubbing his back or rubbing his feet for a while really relaxes him and dramatically reduces the stimming for long periods of time. The stimulation to his body from someone else seems to reduce the need to constantly have self-stimulation.

This has only been possible recently, though, at a younger age he wasn't very happy with other people touching him that much and wouldn't sit still long enough for it to have much effect.

I'm glad your son is responding to therapy so well and you probably shouldn't worry too much about this. As he recovers, he will probably stim less. Good luck!