In the coming months here at AutismSpot, we’re going to be shining the spotlight on parents raising kids with Autism Spectrum Disorders. As we continue our “Spotlight” series in December, we’re featuring mothers from the Dallas/Fort Worth area found in the final photo of The Autism File Autism Mothers Unite Worldwide 2011 Calendar. Click here for more information about our “Spotlight” Series.

Today, it is my pleasure to share Julie Hornok’s candid, touching and thoughtful story. Julie is a tremendous mother and advocate. She’s also an avid blogger, making sure to share her daughter’s progress so that any parent in need of a little hope and inspiration to persevere (in the face of exhaustion and frustration) will be able to find it.

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By Julie Hornok

I was the woman who glared at the kid misbehaving in Target.

I was the mom who was annoyed that my oldest son could no longer bring his favorite peanut butter and jelly sandwich to pre-school because some kid was allergic to peanuts.

Then I had a child with autism, and another child with life-threatening allergies.

People always tell me that God only gives you what you can handle, but I believe just the opposite. God gave me exactly what I couldn’t handle to change me. I am not sure if I was truly indifferent to the suffering of the world, or if I just wasn’t willing to go there emotionally because my life had always been relatively stress free. Either way, when my middle child, Lizzie, was diagnosed with autism, and Noah, my youngest son, was born with immune issues, I was knocked to my knees. I had no other choice but to rethink everything…from what I put on our dinner plates to the very core of who I am.

Lizzie was enjoyably easy as a toddler. I used to joke that I could leave a plate of food and a sippy cup of milk and leave her for the day. She wouldn’t even notice I was gone. After dealing with a clingy and colicky first child, I was happy and relieved for what I thought was her easy-going nature. As the months went by, Lizzie would flip pages in her books for hours, and her occasional arm flapping turned into complete avoidance of interaction with people. She would talk in repetitive jibberish to her hands all day long, shutting us out of her world. There was no question of the diagnosis. She had every red flag. Just days after her 2nd birthday, Lizzie was a classic case of slow regression into autism.

My husband, Greg, and I jumped in with both feet. “In two years she’ll be good as new,” we naively thought to ourselves. Thirty hours a week of ABA, OT, speech, and a strict GFCF diet. We were thankful for every word she said and for every task she mastered. Lizzie was progressing well, and we were hopeful.

As her 4th birthday neared, I began to dread the date. Although she had come a long way, we still had no connection with her. Lizzie had skills and language that she could use upon command, but she still seemed to live in her own private world. We had yet to have a social interaction. I mourned the little girl that I was so sure by age 4 would be chatting and shopping with me. The only thing she wanted to do at the mall was jump in the fountain! I knew something had to change.

That was when we found Floortime. We halted ABA and only concentrated on engagement. We also started looking into nutrition and trying to heal her body from the inside out. We cleared out the metals, viruses and bacteria with homeopathy and supplemented with the vitamins and minerals her body was so deficient in. We slowly, not over the course of months, but over the course of years, got our little girl back. At first, I would think, “Wow! Lizzie was with us for a whole five minutes,” and then one day I realized she was with us practically all the time!

Now, at almost 8 years old, Lizzie is mainstreamed in public school the entire day with some support. She actively seeks out friendships and has had the same best friend for over two years. We have new challenges every day, but we also have a relationship with our little girl. She tells me that she loves me and takes interest in the lives of her family and friends. That is the hope I would like to share with the moms of newly diagnosed kids. Lizzie is nowhere near recovered. While we all want a quick recovery for our kids that just doesn’t happen very often. If we settle in for the long haul and don’t give up, we will see progress. And even joy, as we start to really appreciate the little things in our lives.

Autism changes us. Next fall all three of my children will be in school and maybe then, I will have time to reflect on how Lizzie’s journey has changed me. I do know that my eyes have been opened to the trials of others, and my heart has slowly and painfully been stripped of judgment. I just hope that who I am in the years to come will show that the change in me is for the better.

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Lizzie's video blog address: www.lizziehornok.blogspot.com. Julie shares, “I remember that when Lizzie was first diagnosed, all I wanted to see was ONE child that had made progress. Once Lizzie started progressing, we put her blog together...”

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Leigh Attaway Wilcox is a writer and editor for the projectLD family of companies. Leigh is Assistant Editor of the internationally acclaimed AutismSpot.com and her work can be found on many of the pLDNetworks sites. Leigh is a guest blogger for the Dallas Morning News on the Dallas Moms Blog and is the author of ALL BETTER: A Touch-and-Heal Book published by Piggy Toes Press in 2007. Leigh lives in North Texas with her husband and young son who loves reading, LEGOs, Mario Bros. and also happens to live with Asperger's Syndrome, an Autism Spectrum Disorder.