Like many people on this site I tend to blog when in crisis mode. That is when I look for support and info and knowledge and a community of people who might just understand.
My aspergers daughter has a brain disorder. A neurological disorder that means her brain does not function in a "normal" way. She is very immature for her age and unsophisticated.
She had an incident at school this week where she was in over her head. This occurred due to a systemic breakdown of communication. She was basically set up for failure. She became frustrated and threw a book at her teacher. This is the second time this has happened. The teacher intends to press charges. (They pressed charges last year but they were dropped because I was able to prove without a doubt that the school violated her civil rights and her ARD).
WHAT KIND OF TEACHER PRESSES CHARGES AGAINST AN 11 YEAR OLD AUTISTIC CHILD???
I can only think that this is district encouraged. Last year she didn't even make contact with teacher and the teacher stated that she was offended. Well I am offended that an autistic child is treated like a criminal when the school takes no responsibility for putting her in this situation and not having given her the skills to cope and make better choices. Wouldn't this be a clear indication that the school is not doing their job and not an opportunity to give a child a criminal record. I have to wonder if the result would have been the same if the child had an obvious disability like Down's Syndrome?? It is easier to blame the child.
They say children are not capable of understanding the consequences of their actions and this is why there is no death penalty when children commit murder. Yet my child with a brain disorder will be made to face criminal responsibility for her actions.
I am in no way insinuating that I believe what she did was OK. Violence is never the answer but come on folks.....
They suspended her for two days. Notifying me one day at a time. On the second day they informed that she would be moved to an "alternative" school but until we meet for an ARD they expect her to return to the campus where the incident took place and be put in an in school type of suspension.
I will not send her back to that campus and set her up for failure. What choices do I have - next they will arrest me for allowing my child to be truant. The law says I have to send my child to school. How many parents would send their children into a situation where she will do what an autistic child will do and the school will press charges?? This entire situation only increases her stress (and the overall stress in the household) which increases the chance that something like this will happen again.
The teacher went to see the nurse and then went home due to stress. Is she going to try for disability or sue for emotional stress and lost wages? When did sending a child to school become a liability issue for parents?? I am in a nightmare situation of lose, lose or lose.
Many parents just send their kids to private school or home school. This allows the school to continue to do this type of thing. No matter what this is going to cost me thousands of dollars for either a lawyer or private school. In these uncertain times it is very scary to commit that kind of money when no one is sure they will have a job next week.
If only crying helped matters......