Father's Day is not a time that we typically plan big events. We learned early on that large family or group events often meant more stress and fatigue on Sam and on us. He had difficulty with noise (i.e. the diagnosis at age two of Sensory Integration Dysfunction) and when lots of people were around it created a significant level of stress for him. When your child is stressed and hurting, you too hurt. It was hard on the extended family at first to understand that no matter how "accepting" they were of his needs, it made no difference to him. Simply being in a house with lots of people who were sometimes loud and sometimes quiet and then loud again was confusing and difficult. Finally, we made the decision to simply say that we wanted to create some of our own, small family memories and stick with doing stuff with just the three (and when we added Luke = 4) of us.

The decision to "do our own thing" seemed to impact my sisters more than my parents or Angie's parents. For a while, my sisters seemed to think we were being aloof or anti-family-social. The parental units seemed to understand there was something more going on, even if they didn't quite grasp it all right away. There was never a big issue about this but it wasn't always comfortable either. When your child has special needs, you get "comfortable" with the "uncomfortable" very quickly. It wasn't easy making the decision to stay away from certain settings. I am best friends with Chief (that's the name the grandkids have for my Dad). It's an incredible relationship when your Dad is also one of your closest and most dear friends. My childhood was slightly different than others. At thirteen, both of my sisters had moved out to attend Baylor University and that same year my mom was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis. God's plan is sometimes hard to understand. It is our faith that can help us be centered and deal with all of life's challenges. I have been witness to one of the most amazing and touching love stories you can ever imagine. Chief and Molla have defied all odds, fought MS together hand in hand, survived Colon Cancer and many skin cancer removals....and they continue to fight. Along the way, they have raised three kids and have six grandchildren who are seeing what love and commitment is all about. All these years later, I can look back and see how the experiences dealing with my Mom's MS has better prepared me for helping Sam manage Autism.

This year was a different year at our house. We attended Father's Day at my parents home for the first time in many years. Sam is better prepared to manage this big group setting and we were ready to give things a try. In a matter of seconds, I was given the gift of a picture that I will never in my life forget. It wasn't a picture you can hold or touch. It's a picture that is burned into my memory and has replayed 100's of times over in just the past 18 hours.

As the adults were sitting together in the kitchen and talking, we could hear the gaggle of kids on the other side of the house playing. Amidst the noise I could hear Sam's voice. He wasn't perseverating on the toilets or talking to himself about the fans in the house. It was Sam laughing and playing with his cousins. The noise grew louder and suddenly, in the blink of an eye, Harper (Sam's cousin) was running through the den and right behind him was Sam. IT WAS SAM DOING THE CHASING!! He was actually in hot pursuit as Harper was scrambling to get away. In a flash it was over and the laughter faded out down a distant hall.

I sit here and vividly remember praying month after month asking God to allow me to hear my son's little voice...even just one more time. Those first words were so fleeting and seemed to disappear for an eternity with the possibility of never coming back. Today, I can close my eyes and thank God for the best Father's Day gift a Daddy could receive.

Never take any moment for granted. Never forget that play doesn't come naturally for all kids. Never forget that what might seem so easy for some, may be so difficult for others. Never forget that miracles still happen.