Rock bottom for me is when I find myself sitting in my car eating a Cinnabon. I am likely wearing jeans that I have not washed in two weeks to keep up the facade that I have not gained the holiday weight, and I am drinking a Diet Coke, of course.

It is time for me to get serious about eating healthy again, which means no more sweets and no more Diet Coke. It has been 525,600 minutes, exactly one year, since I had this same conversation with myself. I guess I will add it to my list of New Year’s Resolutions again.

Having the same goal over and over each year can become demoralizing at the very least. Whether it is a small issue like losing a few pounds, or an enormous issue like a goal that my child with autism never masters, it takes all the willpower I have to not throw in the towel and just accept life as “good enough.”

Lizzie was diagnosed just days after her 2nd birthday, and we quickly started an intense 30-hour-a-week therapy program. “Two years of this,” I thought, “and she will be as good as new!” I was excited to get started. I was sure all it would take was two years, and then we could resume our life as we left it before autism entered the picture. Since Lizzie had no functional language, we focused on language. I knew that if I could get her to start talking, her lack of engagement with us and social skills would come around.

As Lizzie’s 4th birthday neared, I realized that even though she had lots of language, it still was not functional. I had yet to have a social interaction with her, and it seemed like it would never come. I mean, we were working really hard 30 hours a week, and she still couldn’t or wouldn’t even look me in the eye unprompted!

I thought about quitting. I thought about just accepting her for who she appeared to be. Maybe this was who she was, and I should back off and allow her to be in her own world. But deep down, I knew better. Inside that body was a little girl that was too sick to even realize she needed help. It was up to me to fight for both of us.

Each day, minute by minute, her therapists and I followed Lizzie around and playfully interrupted her plans for her day. As you can see in the video, we slowly drew her out of her world. This is one of earlier videos out of thousands of hours we worked to get her to spend more and more time in our world. There were no big jumps of progress; just slow, slow steady gains then a few steps backwards and more slow gains. At first I delighted in 10 seconds of Lizzie engaging with me, and then one day, years later, I realized she was almost always with us.

Soon she began enjoying the same things that the rest of the kids did. She started behaving in class, learning in school, tattling on her brothers and forming friendships.

I think back of what would become of her if I had given up when she was 4-years old. It pains me to think I would have missed out on the joy she brings to those around her as she approaches each day with a different, but enthusiastic, view of the world. Only now am I getting to know the real Lizzie.

I learned that a lot can be changed in one year, but only if I persevere through each and every of the 525,600 minutes. Now if only I could apply this same philosophy to how I eat....

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Julie Hornok has been married to her wonderful husband, Greg, for 14 years and is the mother of three children, Andrew, Lizzie and Noah. Lizzie was diagnosed with moderate autism at 2 years old and now, at age 8, is mainstreamed in school and enthusiastically enjoys relationships with friends and family. Julie feels blessed that her daughter has come so far and enjoys spending her free time helping moms with a new autism diagnosis and sharing the small bits of wisdom she has learned along the way. Julie also loves to give back to the community by putting together special needs events. You can see Lizzie's progress on video on her blog www.lizziehornok.blogspot.com.